Mental Health 44

I’ve been thinking a lot about mental health over the last few days. Mainly mine and Sheridan Smith’s.

First, I’ve been feeling down this week. It started on Sunday. I woke up really early, like wide awake too early and felt a bit rubbish all day. Then all week I’ve just really struggled. Struggled to get out of bed. No morning routine, no stretches or affirmations, no fruit for breakfast. Yesterday I felt exhausted. Like my body just felt like Jelly. And I felt cold, but cold inside. I came home from work got into bed and slept for 2 hours. Today I felt numb all day. Nearly cried cos some printing went wrong. Been to Zumba which was good fun and hopefully gave me some endorphins but then got home and ate a tub of Ben and Jerrys.

I’ve been racking my brains to try and work out what’s wrong. And I can’t find it. Yes I can come up with a load of reasons that just feel like excuses, work is crazy busy, I’m tired, feeling fat and unfit, I’m a grumpy mare or just a depressed person. I feel like I have to justify my feelings, justify my mood and my emotions. So when I saw this article today. I loved it. I resonated with it straight away. You do not have to justify your mental health. Sheridan Smith doesn’t and I don’t. We’ll see how long it lasts because I mainly try and justify my mental health to myself. But trying to justify it doesn’t help, doesn’t make it any better or easier.

I am so glad that I’m not Sheridan Smith or anyone else in the spotlight especially when I’m going through a hard time. Sheridan tweeted and apologised for not being strong enough and that broke my heart. It’s something I do. Apologise for being sad, feeling down or not enough. For the first and probably last time I wholeheartedly agreed with something Katie Hopkins wrote in the DailyMail. Leave Sheridan Smith, Caroline Flack and anyone else who’s on the brink of a so called breakdown alone. Mental health, anxiety, depression and stress should never be funny ❀️ and that’s why so many of us keep it under wraps. Me included.

Let me know what you think

44 thoughts on “Mental Health

  • beetleypete

    Sorry to hear that things unexplained are getting on top of you. I will offer no easy answers or platitudes, just say that many of have been through something similar at some time in life. Things generally change; not always for the better, but different enough to take the edge off.
    I am going through something at the moment that I did not expect to have to encounter at my age, (64) and during retirement to boot. The difference is, I know the reasons behind it, and have something to deal with as a result.
    I will be thinking of you, and wishing good things your way.
    Regards from Beetley. Pete.

    • LaurenEph Post author

      Thank you for your kind words Pete. I hope that whatever you are going through works itself out soon. I read your post about vertigo and hope it is soon vertigone again!

  • scribbleartie

    I empathise with you. If I were there I would give you a hug! Nobody, and I mean NOBODY should have to justify, excuse themselves, or apologise for how they feel. I think this social media malarky has a lot to do with it – everyone feels like they should be happyhappy, and having fun exciting lives, and grinning like baboons on a bunch of banana’s. The pressure we put upon ourselves for the sake of others is horrendous! We are human beings – we are complicated and mysterious. We should accept each others ebb and flow, rather than see it as something to be shoved away out of sight. I hope you work a way through this, with support from your family, and others. If you need a shoulder to vent on, email me: πŸ™‚

  • recoverytowellness

    An interesting post! Sorry to hear that you’ve been having a tough time, that’s never much fun, and I hope you start feeling better and on top of things again soon <3 <3

    I'm glad this other article resonated with you and was able to help a bit. I think it makes sense that we're so conditioned to have a reason for why we're upset, and sometimes others put that pressure on us by asking, when sometimes there just isn't a specific reason, it just is. I don't know if justification is something I struggle with so much as 'proving' things aren't well or that I could act on something and validating/acknowledging my own emotions and experiences. I struggle with those two more I think, but at least now I can see from afar when they start creeping up again. At least that's helpful!

    Sending you a warm basket of fruit goodies! =] <3 <3

    • LaurenEph Post author

      Thankyou for your kind words. I’m glad you found the post interesting. Did you read the other article? Reading that and writing this post helped me. Made me not worry about being worried and down and reminded me that it will pass. I’ve had a good weekend and am feeling better now. I hope you are feeling well?

  • 4ever21christina

    I am annoyed right now cause I wrote you this long comment then I switched appa and it went away so here I go again.
    I am so sorry to hear that you feel that way. Know that it’s universal. I could relate to that too. Sometimes I feel like out pyche or whatever you call it has so many knots and knots within knots within knots. One of those knots are causing the guilt or the hurt of whatever but something we can’t even reach that knot because there are other knots about it. I am blessed (and cursed) with being in tune with my emotions too.
    Here is what helps me aka advise:
    1. I wake up I dump all my thought and fears and shit (pardon my French) I have to do there. The gimmick about this website is that you gotta write with no stopping until you reach 750 words so it kinda forces you to type out your every though and you’d be surprised where that takes you. Also it gives you some insight to your entry after you’re done and it liberates you from “that” voice in our heads and helps you control it. Also I used it as a too to write letters to God because he is the only one that could help me untie the knots I can’t even touch. So write raw and pray.
    2. “There is never nothing going on” that’s a quote from the move “the peaceful warrior” (check it out) I love it because I can get pretty depressed if all I am spending my energy on is myself and listenning to my thoughts and emotions. Instead, I should switch from “selfie ” mode and look at what’s around. There is always one thing that you could do to someone else that will make you and them feel better. Something as small as writing a comment on someone’s blog or giving change to a homeless person.
    3. Be productive: the more productive I feel, the more optimistic and driven I feel
    4. I know life gets dull sometimes but our secret weapon is our minds so always nurture by reading good books and reflecting on them or watching good movies that inspire you. Keep the little child in you alive by having a curious soul.

    Hope I helped in any small way, I am here if you need anything.

    • LaurenEph Post author

      Thankyou so much for your comment and lovely kind words. I will definitely check out the 750 words – sounds really interesting and like a good idea! Thankyou for all the brilliant suggestions X

  • Niki

    I’m so sorry to hear that you’ve been feeling that way. I struggled with depression for 10-12 years and I’m only 30… I know what it’s like. You aren’t alone, so many people go through it. Some keep it under wraps, some try though they might, and others just can’t hide it anymore. I don’t think there’s a cure all for depression, but hopefully you can do what brings you great joy often. If you enjoy something in nature (a lake, sitting under a tree, watching the sunset) that’s one thing that I found really helped me. Seems silly but it gave me peace that not many things could. If you ever need anyone to talk to, please feel free to email me ( No it’s not weak to get support, no you aren’t a bother, no it’s not wasting my time, yes I really mean it, you’re worth it, you deserve it. You don’t have to justify your feelings to anyone- not even yourself. Sometimes you have to accept them but release them, the important part is to not live in those feelings. Easier said than done- I know! But it can be done. You are making great steps already! I can tell you something, the depressed pessimistic me 3 years ago would not have participated in a kindness challenge. I didn’t feel very kind, didn’t want to think about being kind, didn’t want to exert any unnecessary energy or thoughts, and likely wouldn’t have found kindness if my life depended on it.

    In the famous words of A.A. Milne- “You’re braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.”

    • LaurenEph Post author

      Thankyou so much for your kind comments Niki. I’ve realised that I’ve probably been battling it since I was a teenager so 10-12 years for me also. Will email you when I know what to say! Great quote from A.A. Milne thankyou X

  • thoughtsnlifeblog

    Many things can tire us out and make us feel really down and it all doom and gloom. Meditation is really good thing to do every day, as well as exercise and journaling. Even if we meditate for five mins, and journal for 5 and exercise may be 30 mins, or blast music. We need to find time for us especially when it is silly bust – cause that when we hit rock bottom. I have posted on what I call the mood roller-coaster the power of journaling , how thoughts impact our moods and our life. It is amazing how we self sabotage our life….our thoughts can make us happy or sad. And always being on the go and no me time – well we will feel a bit what is going on.

    We all get to this place from time to time, and its about how we get out of it and just accept it is a short guest – not planning to stay long, so lets get to gym and meditate and kick the unwanted guest out!!

    Wishing you a good week ahead

    • LaurenEph Post author

      Thankyou for your comment, great advice for meditation, journalling, exercise and music! Could you send me a link for your power of journalling post please? I’d like to read it – had a quick look on your blog but couldn’t find it! πŸ™‚

  • finethanksyou

    I can’t believe that I have just read it. It’s like you read my mind and put the words on a blog! It’s something small, but podcasts (not music) and long walks genuinely do help me. It feels like escaping into the open air.

    • LaurenEph Post author

      Thankyou so much for your kind comment, it’s lovely to hear that my words meant that much to you. You’re right, music, podcasts and fresh air really do help. Hope you’re well and doing ok πŸ˜€

    • LaurenEph Post author

      Thanks for your lovely comment, it’s really nice to hear that you resonate with my words. Blogging is one of the things that helps, and we have a kind community here πŸ˜€

  • CraftyDivazAus

    Sometimes you just can’t pin point a real reason why you might be feeling low or sluggish etc… The human brain and emotions etc can’t always be defined or explained. The best you can do is admit when you do feel low and try to do something to help relieve any negative emotions or tension etc until you are able to feel better again. Hope you felt better quickly and don’t feel low too often. Will be reading more of your posts etc!

    • LaurenEph Post author

      Thankyou for your comment. I’m really pleased that you liked the post and that my writing resonated with you. It helps me to write, I love knowing that I’m helping others and it makes me know I’m not on my own either! We can all be in this together ❀️

  • evenmoreyou

    I am so sorry that you had such a tough time. I feel that too often we want to deny feeling sad or bad that we think these emotions are bad. Granted feeling sad for days or weeks can have negative results on health (lead to depression). At the same time though, being sad should be recognized just as much as if you were feeling happy. For me I try to recognize what I am feeling and then ponder why. I allow myself time to be sad and then I move on. Have you tried meditating or mindfulness? Thank you for sharing, I hope you are having a better day.


    • LaurenEph Post author

      Thankyou or your comment Carlee. Being open and hwriting nest about my feelings is something I’m continually working on. It’s so much better to express how you are feeling – whatever that is. I’ve tried both mindfulness and meditation before – think I need to try again!

  • Katie Rose

    Thanks so much for sharing this – I often feel as though I have to explain myself. But it’s an illness, and we shouldn’t have to, and I’m learning that now. Hope you’re good. πŸ™‚

  • nancyt18

    Hi Lauren, I absolutely understand what you went through, as I have seen and supported my mother while battling with depression. Great that you are sharing your experiences, as communication itself helps largely. I know its hard to create optimism around at such times, but doing the littlest of something that makes you happy or a kind deed everyday could help going further.
    I am as well writing about mental health, hoping to create awareness through own experiences.

  • justanotheranxiousannie

    Hope that today you are feeling a lot better! I think you are extremely brave for speaking out about your mental health (it seems to be such an unnecessarily taboo subject). I have started writing my blog again about my anxiety and it’s given me strength that I didn’t know I had and to be able to talk freely. I haven’t shared my blog or revealed myself yet but one day I will be brave enough to! I wish you a lovely happy days <3 x

    • LaurenEph Post author

      Thankyou for your kind comments, I’m glad you enjoyed reading this post. Blogging about it certainly seems to help me, hope it does for you too. I will take a look at your blog. Hope you take a look round my blog and find some other posts that you like! πŸ˜€